i want or the world is topsy turvy

okay well not really topsy turvy. it’s a bit different since mom is back now but that’s okay at the moment. she brought my candy bar baby announcement for my niece and the announcement that my brother and sister in law created for the lovely bundle they created. they sent a big picture bundle as well that i need to have to converted over to a cd so i put her on display. well not really display. just put her in my office or something. that was all nice about mom coming back but the feeling of just general disconnect i’ve had lately hasn’t going away.

i think i’ve been a little out of it in general because all the time she was gone i really didn’t invest much energy into killing kittens. i walked around naked a lot well half naked in case someone knocked on the door and i needed to throw something on really quickly. i have just been kinda blah though. i want Him. i want Him to snuggle with and hear snoring in the bed next to me. i want to be thrown against the shower wall and struggle to keep my footing as He thrusts into me and makes me purr. i want lots of things that i can’t have right now because He’s not home. i watched The Unit this week and so shouldn’t have. Hector’s autopsy and memorial were just damn sad. i don’t want to be the new chick who was just getting her relationship established only to have that person taken away with all the promise of the relationship shot to shit. i want to know how peaceful He is when He’s sleeping soundly and how fast He’ll move when i say i want a peanut butter cookie and a milk shake and some lo mein noodles at 3 in the morning in the 8th month of my pregnancy lol. i want the simple things and not so simple things and i want them yesterday but i’ll settle for them tonight or tomorrow or the day after that. i want to know what His lips feel when He kisses me on the back of my neck. yeah that’s what i want.