okay so i’m immensely bored but it’s because i’m full of nervous energy and Emperor is being well Emperor. you know i’m all over the net reading and exposing myself to the lifestyle. being in my current locale means there is a definite lack of people of color to speak to in real life so i’ve joined a few yahoo groups and one of the sites Emperor doesn’t like so much because they are cliquish. they may be but i need more insight than i’m able to gain on my own and whenever i am really ready to talk to Him about it He’s otherwise engaged. yeah i know quit being an impatient sub but He’s the experienced one here. and without His guidance and input i’m just left floundering a bit. that is unless i do my typical this is moving at a funky pace so let me get the hell out of here thing. as i mentioned before there are others who would gladly take me and train me but i have no desire to be enamored of anyone else right now. if it won’t be Him then i’ll keep studying for a while and get myself totally ready for whomever it will be. besides i keep getting distracted by collars which is all random. and i need to drop some weight so i can buy the most restrictive and binding corset i can get my hands on. not sure why the two things have me so preoccupied but maybe its a transference issue so i’m not all annoyed with Emperor. who knows? i’m gonna go have a donut or something ROFL, yes i know counterproductive to the weight loss thing but i need something to put in my mouth since Emperor is not handy. see ya and shuddup sidra.