I just had to check to see when I first posted on this blog. I am a few months shy of 18 years which is stupefying for me but it’s not like I’ve been consistent in that nearly 18 years. Some months have been much more invested than others and there have been long periods where I just didn’t have the mental energy to share anything here. I also went to see when I first tagged a post with Kinky Klaire. That was in 2014 ish but it was referencing my first interaction with Emperor I believe. I was pretty sure he twisted my ankle with the rope and he definitely bruised the fuck out of me so that I couldn’t sit still easily in my early meetings at a job I took shortly after that session. Klaire was/is ultimately the part of me that keeps me out of trouble. She goes to work, she manages the impulses, she makes sure we behave professionally in the spaces that is required and tries to handle all of the details that keep life functioning appropriately. She and I are of course linked but she’s also the one that picks up on things that could get us in trouble with the right person later. She’s who picked up on Emperor being kinky and without her insight and intuition who know what would have happened.
I used to think that she was kind of like my vanilla composite and I’m not sure if that’s not untrue. I think she’s just more present than I give her credit for in general. Klaire is still present when I’m sucking the soul out of someone. She’s just nude, grinning and ready to cum. She’s definitely there when I’m being all domestic and figuring out how to make something yummy be healthy for us or just yummy. She might even be there and free falling when I’m being debased and fisted. Then she just doesn’t have to enact executive functioning. She can relax and and enjoy being pleasured. I’m not sure if she’s entirely present when I’m verging on brat or primal energy but every woman should have a mischievous streak so it would make sense that Klaire and I fall in line there too. I briefly tried to operate a fet group called Kinky Klaire and it got no traction so I shut it down. I wanted to give advice or blog out in a different way so I bought kinkyklaire.com for a while. I think I finally let that go a few years back when my sexual energy just tamped down and my kink connection was non existent.
Right now it feels like I am going through another puberty or some fucking thing. I have been horny as all get out for weeks now. I’ve been masturbating daily, if not more than once a day, and all that is doing is taking the edge off enough for me to do normal day to day things. If I was home alone I’d probably have hooked up the fucking machine and going to town on myself every hour that I’m not in a meeting. Filming them and teasing GN. Potentially flying off and getting spit roasted between a few exes. Like the depraved part of my psyche is chomping at the bit to be fully released and Klaire is the only thing keeping it in check. Left to my own devices, I might be inclined to send smutty messages to Doms that intrigue me offering up my ass for torture or any orifice of their choosing for a plundering. And it’s not that Klaire isn’t intrigued but she seems to have a better handle on our risk assessment than my hind brain. She definitely wants to be stripped naked, tied up and fucked into a stupor but she wants to do it on her terms. Think 50 Shades negotiation scene but with an adult and one less predatory asshole. Well he still might be predatory and might even have a touch of asshole but not in the stalker red room invasion of privacy kind of way. I am totally willing to be overtaken and have my day mostly dictated but within reason because primal slutty me would definitely get fired. Klaire has to keep me in line. I’m not sure if I just let her fade away or if life was so busy that I wasn’t in sync with her but the two of us are making friends again. I like it. If you’re the right kind of predatory maybe you’ll like it too.