some days meh, some days yes bitch

the last few days have been interestingly chaotic for me emotionally.  i have had some ups and downs and most of it was brought on by me thinking i was out of the funk in my head regarding kink.  i mostly have but i still have moments where i default back into my old patterns.  i am not a girl that pursues.  i’m barely a girl that openly flirts.  if i extend myself to you privately and you don’t seem to react or redirect, i likely won’t follow up again because to my mind you are not interested.  which is fine, not everyone needs to be interested in me.  i have seen a number of dominant men who want submissive partners to express interest first and then see where they link up if they do.  it made me think of the Stokely song i heard not too long ago called Verbalize which made me feel some kind of way lol.  when i use my words with people i’m keyed into then i over spill and it is a flood of information that they may not have wanted.  people who want that from me almost never get it because they don’t evoke that level of passion in me.  it’s a weird dichotomy and i’m working on it to a point.

other days i feel like i’m the queen of the universe and that i’m a sculpture and a gift.  i woke up this morning after a few days of meh and just went and handled business.  i enjoyed life, had good conversations and my worry was about dinner and a presentation i need to give on wednesday but not where i lost the thread as it were.  it was a good day and i want to keep driving the rest of the week this way.

Scroll to Top