i logically know that things will be okay, even if it’s a struggle things will be okay. i’m working on things with the new house that aren’t right and are frustrating my mother as a result. that means i get frustrated as well. we’ve had a few come to Jesus moments as of late and that is also frustrating and exhausting. what i really want is curl up in my dominant’s lap while they stroke my hair and tell me to open wide. like my eyes just legit hit a flutter after thinking i might be inhaling a dick while my partner plays in my hair. i miss inhaling dick. i miss people playing in my hair. and i miss people getting tired of both of those things, shoving me face down and fucking me into a stupor while they fill me up or cover my body in their fluids. i miss falling asleep half sticky and being woken up again by a dick in one of my orifices. i miss being teased and tormented and talking and doing nothing. i miss being touched by someone i care about and who i want to make happy. i miss my old doms (a few anyway, especially the one that broke my brain) and that NRE. i miss the feeling of a hand stroking up my spine and wax dripping all over my body and fire play and the sweet agony of nipple clamps being tugged on and tightened. i miss screaming into a pillow or biting a shoulder or being on the verge of waking the neighbors. i miss being claimed. i miss so fucking much but i don’t miss being an adult at all. paying bills, cooking dinner, doing the shopping and not cumming are fucking annoying.
prompt for today: what do people like about you? are those the same things you like about yourself? i have no idea what people like about me honestly. i think they like that i am reliable and smart and funny and if i say i’m going to do something that i try my best to make that thing happen. they also probably like that i’m straightforward and open to new adventures. i like most of those things. i wish asking for what i need was on the list and taking care of myself more was on there too.