Vacations & Consent Violations

Okay folks this vacation is quickly coming to an end and I have to say my bad as it does so.  I flirt a fair amount with people I used to see naked.  Witty banter gets me all hot and bothered if you’re good at it.  And really to get me naked you have to be fairly good at it because I get bored easily.  I’m sure you’re wondering what that has to do with my vacation but just hold on I promise I’ll get to it.  This is my first actual vacation of the year and it was beyond needed.  I had a relatively uneventful flight, took longer than necessary to get to the hotel, and then got to my room after getting some booze and finding out the tv was just dead. Not starting off well, front desk clerk was useless until the shift change and then shortly after midnight all was right with the world again.  And then I did something that never ever crossed my mind and violated a friend’s consent.

Spending time with one of my partners meant for healthy doses of good orgasms and deep sleep that those create.  However, there’s a witty banterer in town that I used to enjoy playing with on a routine basis.  We have managed to miss each other the last few times I have been in town but seemed like things would line up for a visit this trip.  And it did but I apparently failed in my communication skills this time.  He knew I was in town to see someone and that was someone I was dating but in his non kink mind it didn’t register for him, and I apparently didn’t specify, that my date would likely be with me when he arrived and well he was.  We haven’t left the room much since arriving cause yeah sexy time and bed for spankings is all the rage these days.  It also didn’t occur to me to tell him because I thought it was clear that I wasn’t solo.  Even though we still managed to have some private naked shenanigans I wasn’t chalking up his level of discomfort in a situation that to me didn’t warrant it. But yeah I totally violated his consent there because I totally wanted to mount him–with permission of course.

And it really didn’t register for me until he pointed it out earlier this morning and after taking a long soak at the pool it occurred to me that I would never do that with someone with a kink event or venue or relationship so I shouldn’t have done that in this situation.  Vanilla sex activities should still be with full warning and acknowledgement of what someone is walking into just like they would if I was taking them to a dungeon.  So I called him later and apologized.  It was the only polite thing to do especially since we’ve been friends for damn ever on top of periodically unclothing one another.  So yeah I suck bad me but I did apologize and hope that he can forgive my faux pas.  He’s said we’re all good and I will take it as that for the moment.  One the upside we were able to check off another one of the we’ve never done this before things which is kinda amazing for someone I’ve seen naked off and on since 1994.  Back to vacation now.

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