I ask that somewhat ironically as I’m not feeling terribly submissive lately. Looking for jobs is a full time job and while I keep getting interviews I’m not sure if I’m disconnected from everything and am not going over the way I’d like. Plus working for universities means slow hiring process. Either way, my life is mostly consumed with that.
Green Lantern tried to introduce me to someone knew because she was being a sweetheart and I love her for that but when I started getting inquisitive I think I irritated him a bit. I know I can be irritating though so I’m not sure if it was intentional or accidental if I was at all. We weren’t in the same dating space if that makes sense though. After two very long term relationships, I’m enjoying the break. Well most of the time I’m enjoying the break. When I see cute kids or think about my nieces too long I get a little sad that I’m nearing forty with no spouse and no kids but that is my life and not a whole lot I can do to change that right now.
Back to the point of this post. I am a tiny bit bored. I love that I have a world of opportunities open to me right now but I don’t have enough to do. There are projects I could undertake but eh not intriguing enough to keep me stimulated. Plus there’s the whole submissive thing. I don’t know if I mentioned it before but I trashed a lot of old toys. They weren’t being used and I didn’t anticipate a time in which they would be. They were purchased during my relationship with RS and it seemed inappropriate to keep holding on to them on the off chance that someone knew stole my breath and made moist.
It’s hard to remain in a submissive state of mind when those relationships haven’t panned out well and because of general life interference has eliminated coming to a common understanding of a Daddy/little girl or D/s relationship. RS and I seemed to be on the same page but yeah fighting in a war and not coming back puts a damper on things. And GN/last him had so much going on with his ex and that drama that he was either not mentally there or doing way too much too fast.
I’m not sure what I’m wanting right now but I know I don’t quite have it whatever that may be.