today was a good day, well mostly

i enjoyed my job
i enjoyed my life
i enjoyed my painting
i enjoyed my bed
i enjoyed my friends
i enjoyed my necklace
i did not enjoy missing Emperor

God i am turning into such a girl. it’s sickening to me. i enjoyed my life sooooo much more when things made sense to me. i’m not sure if He’s toying with me or if He is bored or chasing someone new. He frustrates me and the moment i want to scream go to hell (yes i’m being melodramatic here because i really only get this fidgety at night)He calls me and He is so sweet and i just want to curl out at His feet like a good kitty (okay so i have feline issues as well).

and the bdsm group i joined is going to jamaica for a collaring. oh my how lovely it would be to play with Him in Negril for a few days. He hasn’t even responded that He got the message let alone that He might be interested in going. i wanna pout and tell Him to go away but i’d miss Him and the way His voice sounds in my ear when He’s whispering that He loves the way my skin looks and how much He is excited by my submission. and then He started talking about my collar and got me all ummm twitterpated. oh this sucks!!! i’m not running off sidra, i’m just annoyed. i wanna play with my sadistic little tyrant. gonna really go pout now. bye people.

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