.:Thursday, February 02, 2006:.

-we need a resolution......-

or i'm sure that's what it seemed like at the time of the last post. i was tired, bordering on exhaustion, in being so far away from someone i care so much about. we talked, we were doing well, we hit a familiar wall, we stopped talking. i had every intention on just going to bed but my righteous indignation cropped up. it was amazing if i do say so myself lol. it was amazing because i never thought i would ever get that fed up about anything going on with us. and amazing because my little brain, in its moment of emotional upheaval, spilled the words that i've been holding to my vest out like a torrent. before i could help myself i had told Him i loved Him and i went to bed. He didn't call right back, thank God, and when i woke up with no message (He's out and about well before i am) i was quite positive that we both had had enough and it was time to work on being away from each other. well that's not true i didn't think about it much. i noticed there was no message and i went to work. no crying, no sobbing, just went to work.

i turned on my instant messenger and went about my day, somewhere before my first client He apparently finally got said message lol and was more than upset with me. had it been feasible to beam me on over to Him at that moment i am quite positive i would have gotten the worst spanking ever. after venting mutual frustration, He did the one thing i've been needing Him to do for ages. He made me stop and remember that i was His. not in the platitude kind of way i sometimes go on about here but that if He wanted me gone i would know as He has never kept things from me before. it was necessary and long overdue. and after the venting plans were finally made to see one another for certain and i'm sure we'll do some more debating and discussing and make some decisions for ourselves. we're not in sync but we are on the same page again and after the visit i'll know more about what is in store for us. okay that's enough for now.

red
Posted By red velvet at 10:59 PM

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